Exclusive!

 Shocking pictures document horrific abuse suffered by WEF7 at the hands of her enraged father!

These will surely be featured in her future bestselling expose’ describing her tragic childhood, “Daddy Dearest”.

“The real mystery of things is not what they are, but that they are.”

I don’t want to scandalize anyone - but for some time now, I’d say almost two years, I’ve not felt something I’ve felt my entire life, ever since being a little boy who looked up into the night sky and saw the stars and thought and felt, “God exists.”  I still have faith in God’s existence.  I still know, in a sense, that God exists.  But how do I feel?  That intution, that feeling, and even my reasons, have somehow left me.  It is very odd.  Because I have memories of those feelings and reasons, but I no longer really have that feeling or think those reasons.  I have memories of my logical reasons for believing - but these memories are old, dusty, and have little daily impact except that I know that I once proved God’s existence to myself as a settled matter.  But this reasoning isn’t at the ‘tip of my mind’, so to speak.  The settled matter remained settled, but somehow forgotten.  It is just a memory of sorts.  And so I find myself praying, asking God to guide me, and I find him saying - ‘return to the beginning, to the stars, to the reasons that you had in the first place, to seeking me with your whole heart and whole mind’.

And so I begin again, by asking myself, does God exist?  I feel that I still have faith - I still choose to follow God, even as I grope numb and blind.  I have not turned from him, though I no longer perceive him as I once did.  So I turn my thoughts and my heart again to this vital question - does God exist?  Not in the sense of questioning his existence, but in the sense of - where are you, why are you, how are you, who are you?

I think that this will become a series of posts about my renewed search for God.  Does it seem absurd to search for something you already know exists?  Well, think about losing your car keys.  You know the keys exist.  You know you need the car to get where you’re going.  You even know what the keys look like.  But for your life, you can’t remember where those keys are.  You can’t find them.  You’ve kind of stopped looking for them.  You ponder the idea that they are lost forever.  But no.  They are here somewhere.  They are simply misplaced.  And so too is my conviction in God’s existence - my subjective feelings and reasons that believe in his existence.  I know he exists.  I still follow him.  But I want to see him again like I used to - dare I say, almost face-to-face. 

Follow me on this journey if you like!  I’ll be examining every possible argument, and do my best to formulate my own reasons and ideas.  I’m not out to convince anyone but myself.  Please don’t hesitate to leave your best criticisms and insights - I want to leave no stone unturned.  I hope we can all further our pursuit of truth together, even if we end up (mostly likely) disagreeing sharply.